Annastacia Palaszczuk’s “Stay Safe” Checklist for Nanny State Devotees
Stay safe, Queensland – tie your shoelaces with a double clove-hitch knot just to be certain
Stay safe, Queensland – it’s set to rain today so bring your high-viz, rubber-shaft-and-handle umbrella
Stay safe, Queensland – only kiss your wife if she’s wearing two N95 covid masks
Stay safe, Queensland – lock your house when you leave in the morning and double-check the spare keys under the doormat and pot-plant
Stay safe, Queensland – walk only on the designated footpath, stepping on cracks permitted but not recommended
Stay safe, Queensland – blow your nose in private with a government-certified 4-ply disposable tissue
Stay safe, Queensland – lift heavy objects from a squatting position
Stay safe, Queensland – only cross the road at a designated pedestrian crossingShare Liberty Itch
Stay safe, Queensland – avoid reading Dr. Seuss to your child
Stay safe, Queensland – wear your seat-belt when towing your boat up the ramp from the water or face a $365 on-the-spot fine
Stay safe, Queensland – no sex with your husband unless he unpacks the dishwasher and wears a condom, in that order but not simultaneously
Stay safe, Queensland – last drinks are at 2am!
Government: protecting you more and more each day. Your safety guaranteed.
Freedom? We’ll get back to you.
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